The last few months have been a whirlwind. It’s been easy to see the hand of God moving, providing, parting the waters, clearly shaping our hearts and going before us.

But in the last few days, the winds have changed. If it weren’t for the powerful work of the previous months, I would be tempted to believe that God has removed His hand. Actually, I am tempted to unbelief, but in His mercy, I can see it as a lie.

I’ve been working out a lot lately, trying to increase my strength and lose a lot of weight. After I’ve been off for a couple of days, it’s always good to get back to the gym, to push hard on cardio, to really work hard on the weights. Afterward, I’m exhausted – my muscles are shaky and spasming, I’m soaked in sweat. I shower, eat, rehydrate, and I’m fine. The next day, I’m aching. I don’t want to go back.

But I go. I know I need to go, for my health, for continuingly building results. And deep in my heart, I really want to go, because I want to work through the pain, to feel better. And that’s where we are.

It’s hard to keep going. Three days ago, I was ready to take on the world, and now the wind has dropped and my sails are sagging. Yet I know that God is still here, is still leading, providing, making the path. I have grown, and am a different man than I was 6 months ago. And so now, I need to take that step out the door, to keep moving forward, pursuing the call we feel God has given us. My soul aches – longing to be more, longing to have the faith to overcome, longing to see this vision become real. Now I see a poor reflection.